Slob

A post in response to today’s daily one-word prompt.

The weirdest things fly out of my piehole sometimes. I just told someone in the elevator, “I usually try to avoid dog spit”.

I can explain. I think. A group of us got on the elevator. Two men, myself and another woman with her little pug. The dog looked at me with a snarky attitude like he felt he was too good to be bothered with the insignificance of me. I was thinking to myself, “Good! Because I don’t want to be bothered with you either!” I’m pretty sure I rolled my eyes at him. Next thing I know, the dog walks over to one of the guys and gently stands/jumps up on his leg to be pet. The man reaches down and gives him gobs of sweet attention. The dog owner said, “Awww, he likes you”. Then the dog turns and does the exact same thing to the other guy, and he gets the same great response. I kid you not, the dog turns and looks dead at me all attitudy and then walks back towards his owner. AWKWARD! I was hoping maybe he would change his mind and come over to me so I wouldn’t look like such a jerk.

Right before the elevator reached their floor, he came over to me! I pet him like crazy! Gave him extra special lovin’! And he gave me special lovin’ right back! I wanted to pick him up and just hug and kiss him! We connected and I realized he was super cute. So adorable! I hoped I’d run into my new little buddy again on the elevator one day. After they got off, it was only me and one guy left. I looked down and realized I had a ton of dog slob on my damn hand. Hence my comment.

Everyone has their idiosyncrasies right? Well one of mine is that I’m a germaphobe and dog slob touching my body absolutely freaks me out. I’m frigid when it comes to petting a dog for this exact reason. I think dogs are wonderful by the way, I grew up with them (and I even just rescued one recently that was put out of a car in front of my house). But… I don’t want dog slob on me. Period! The whole germaphobe thing. Maybe Mr. Pug felt that vibe from me. Well, our friendship was fun while it lasted…