Woohoo. Great. It’s My Birthday (birthday schmirthday).

Here’s a “glass half empty or glass half full” post for ya. Today is my birthday and I hate doing any sort of big to-do. I just don’t need it. I’m fine going on about my day like any other day, but that is not quite what happened today.

These things irritated the hell out of me:

• Woke up early to throw my clothes in the dryer. That’s when I realized the washer had stopped at beginning of the wash cycle and my clothes had just been sitting in a bunch of water in the washer all night instead. The clothes I was going to wear to work today were in there.
• I don’t use heat in my hair anymore but I needed to wash it this morning and since the whole washer thing threw my timing off, I needed to use my blow dryer to quickly dry my hair before rushing out the door. My blow dryer wouldn’t turn on though, it was completely dead! So I stood in front of my floor fan trying to get my hair somewhat half-ass dry before rushing out the door (with damp hair). Seriously Universe?? Seriously???
• I got off the BART train and accidentally went through a different exit so needed to walk a ways to get to back to the right exit. I was late for work, by the way, because there was police activity on another train earlier, causing a back-up. I walked extra fast with my flip-flops on because I can’t find my commute tennishoes at the moment. Don’t ask. FYI: It’s not very comfortable to commute in flip-flops. I got to my exit to realize the escalator was currently out of service. It’s not very comfortable walking up a bazillion stairs in flip-flops either. Yeah…. My morning was going great!
• Everyone at work knows I don’t want a spectacle of my birthday. Period. They all hella know. I got into work after walking extra briskly because I was late and everyone began coming over to hug me and say happy birthday. I was sweating from the uncomfortable extra brisk walk-running I just did in the flip-flops, trying not to drip on people and trying to smile at the same time instead of being rude and reminding them I don’t like happy birthday shit!
• Some coworkers said, ‘Wow, you cut your hair!!’ But I didn’t. I just had major shrinkage because I wasn’t able to do what I usually do to it this morning.
• My mom’s nursing home called to have a meeting with me about her sudden weight loss. I’m holding in my tears by this point (and it made me remember that last year on my birthday I got a call from them saying she couldn’t walk anymore and would need to be in a wheelchair from here on). So yeah, there’s that…
• A very large group of coworkers came over to me later in the day with a cake and a loud happy birthday song. I’ll remind you that they all know I don’t want that!!!! Ever!
• I ate cake. Now I’m fatter than I already was. The fu*cked up too-small shirt that I was forced to put on this morning (because I’m hella fat and the huge loose shirts that I have that actually fit were all in the unwashed clothes in the washer this morning) was even tighter than it was earlier and the rolls couldn’t even be hidden. Not even a little bit.
• It’s after 5:30PM now and still no call or even a text from my son to say happy birthday. WTMF. Seriously Universe? Seriously son??
• My husband was getting on my nerves last night.
• I’ve had a headache all day but gave my last bit of Advil to my coworker for her headache (hers stemmed from a recent dentist appointment, so her pain was probably more intense than mine).
• I wish today was Friday!

Things that did not irritate me and that I am happy about:

• At least I woke up. I did have some clothes to put on, albeit too-small as hell, I had something to wear. And it was stretchy.
• My hair looked dry like hay and was very fuzzy and absolutely ridiculous BUT at least it smelled good. I have some fantastic smelling conditioner right now worthy of bringing me happiness.
• I’m glad I have a floor fan and I’m glad it works.
• At least my BART train didn’t break down. And I got a few extra steps in taking the stairs since the escalator was broken. Maybe that will help burn off some of the cake I ate.
• I got into work and a bunch of people came by to hug me and say happy birthday. I appreciate them! I really do! Even though I hate the whole birthday thing, it made me happy knowing they thought of me and took the time out to let me know.
• Some sweet coworkers that I adore took me out for a birthday lunch and that meant a lot to me!
• A large group of coworkers came over to me later in the day with a cake and a loud happy birthday song. I was very appreciative and genuinely felt good about it! Surprisingly!!
• I ate cake and it was good.
• Both my daughters called/texted me to say happy birthday, which made my day.
• A lot of people that I love dearly reached out to me today to wish me a good day.
• My husband’s smile when he looked at me last night really warmed my heart.
• I’ll be home soon where I have Advil waiting for me and my headache!
• Tomorrow is Friday!